After you have made the conscious decision to accept the transformation, you will feel at peace. Acceptance as a conscious decision gives you the opportunity to view the change as a positive and expand your perspectives. Your act of self leadership can open the door for other people to embrace the same positive energy. In an organization, you might see a merger as a chance to discover new clients or achieve a professional career path.

Acceptance helps you to become curious about a new way of living life where you are relaxed about the realities you experience. You are open to inevitability of new policies and adaptations. By adopting this state of mind, you can improve your mental health and creative mindset. New, creative thoughts are generated which can help your company to design innovative, new products. Instead of focusing on the negatives, you are able to focus on how you impact the lives of those around you. This improves the experience for your clients and enhances the positive energy for everyone in the workplace.

We cannot change anything until we accept it. Condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses. -Carl Jung

Susan Russo wrote in one of her article:

Accepting what happens to you in life isn’t always easy, but what is so easy about not accepting things? As a matter of fact, it’s a lot easier on yourself to learn how to accept things than it is to deal with the havoc the resistance wreaks in your life. You need to give yourself a good talking to. You need to let yourself know that even though things didn’t work out the way you wanted doesn’t mean they won’t down the road with someone or something else in your life. When you learn the Art of Acceptance you will be prepared to deal with life with grace and you can invite adversity in the next time it knocks at your door, because the sooner you let it in, the sooner it is going to leave. But by resisting it, you will only prolong the inevitable.

Set yourself free and embrace any situation without judgment. 

As the workplace and your life are transformed, you can tolerate the differences by learning how to cope. Each transformation is a part of the natural evolution and growth process. Although we may not want to embrace the new policies, we can learn how envision each policy with a positive outcome. Consider how each policy can be used to benefit yourself, your family and organization. New policies are adopted for a reason and by considering what this reason is; we can learn to cope with it.

As we take this opportunity to use positive energy and attitudes in our lives, we can practice self leadership and take control of our own perspectives. Once you have reached this milestone, you will feel less stressed out and become more relieved.

After you made the conscious decision to view things in a positive light, stop and consider how these transformations can benefit those around you. I once had a conversation with someone who lived in California. I was impressed by the progress and green initiatives the state had taken up. When I asked her about them, he responded negatively. She did not like the progress being made because switching technologies incurred a cost. Due to this, she had decided to move to another state.

Instead of embracing the new policy, she chose to run away to avoid it. At no point did she stop to consider what this policy meant for her neighbors, coworkers and the environment. Rather than realize that this policy could make a healthier quality of life for everyone around her, she was only concerned about how she used to do things and what the policy would cost. Ironically, she would have saved money over time after making the switch. Instead of stopping to consider this factor, she rejected any new policy and left the state.

We each have the possibility to take advantage of new policies in our lives. We can view them negatively like she did, or see their true value. A policy is intended to impact more than just you. Consider how it can benefit other people, attract newcomers to the area or create a better environment for your family. New policies are not chosen without reason. By contemplating what these reasons are, we can learn how to adjust and even like the new policies.

By viewing change negatively, some people will reject that it even exists: this is called denial. They refuse to use the new policies in their work and will not accept the new status quo. Transformations challenge our belief systems and daily habits. Rather than transform their lives, these individuals choose to remain with the old patterns of living. They may try to bargain with the instigators of the new policies or bargain them down. Overall, they seek to negate the differences in the workplace because they see the new policies as a loss.

When confronted by other people, the individuals who are against the new policies may respond with anger or hostility. If you are one of these people or know someone who greets each new policy with denial, anger or despair, we can help. Individuals who do not seek help for dealing with these new transformations may face a wave of discouragement, concern, confusion and discomfort.

What about taking another approach? How would it feel to go through a transition while experiencing pleasure?

Learn more 

Why me? Why do I have to do this? Whose idea is it anyhow? How does this impact my life?

A lot of people will ask these questions when confronted with new policies or ideas. They may react with surprise or negativity to any new events in their workplace or private lives. Change often brings with it a very strong emotional charge. Some people let this transformation control their minds externally and have a negative perspective. They may react emotionally to the new ideas and policies by exhibiting fear or displeasure. Individuals may fear the loss of control in the workplace, the unknown or be afraid that they will lose influence with a friend. They believe this transformation is a slap in the face and was intended for them alone.

This negative perspective is draining. It takes the focus away from enjoying life and instead causes individuals to feel unsettled depression, disappointment, insecurity and avoidance. By not practicing self leadership and taking each transformation as an opportunity to do better, individuals impact everyone around them negatively.

Does that sound familiar?

One of my dear friend posted an interesting question of our Facebook Page

“If you’re forced to work with a pessimistic person who would complain about everything in her position but refuse to change a thing, this could probably bring you down. What can you do to stop this negative environment and stay positive?”

Hi Audrey,

It is a typical situation happening at work and it can happen in a relationship as well. It is probably fair to acknowledge we all have to experience it one day or another in our professional environment. It is understandable for a person working with a negative coworker or living with a pessimistic to feel drowning in negativity as well sometimes. There are many opportunities for improvement and if you want a positive change you may get it.

1- the person who desires the change and stays positive wants to ask what makes her/him so affected by this negative behavior.

2- when the situation arises the feelings and the emotions provoked needs to be identified, acknowledged and validated.

Identify and acknowledge the emotion: “I feel irritated because even though we reached our goals my boss has complained about the fact we could have done better”, “I feel upset because for my coworker it is never enough, I want to celebrate my great work but I can’t with this pessimism”, “I feel down because my boss is always complaining about our results and not recognizing our efforts”

Validate: In any of this situation comfort you by recognizing that these feelings are exactly what they should be in these circumstances. Everybody would feel irritated or frustrated in any of the given situation when they happened. You are totally normal!

3- Now comes the time to detach oneself from the emotional stage and to rationalize the situation. Indeed, how much control do you have on this given situation?

How much do you think you can change a person? A)I certainly can /B) I don’t know/C) I can’t
How much does the situation worth your energy? A) A lot/B) A little/C) None
How much do you think you can change yourself and your attitude toward this situation? A) I certainly/ B) I don’t know / C) I can but I won’t

If 2 or more of your responses are C questions move to #4
If the responses are B or combination of A & B move to #4
If the responses are a combination of B & C or only C Stop here and ask yourself how much you really want the change and how much comfortable for you it may be to stay in this situation. It may be easier for now to blame the other for feeling drained and being down, it may be denial of your own negative energy or it may be wanting to keep this conflicting relationship for other reasons that may be explored.

4- A relationship has been established between “you” and the person with the negative attitude. Responding the same way over and over will make the situation remain the same and repeat itself over and over again.

What can you change in your response that may break the pattern?
Since the negative energy may drag you down, how much do you think your positive energy may impact the other person and lift him/her up?

How much would it cost you to have a conversation with this person and telling him or her how this negative environment MAKES YOU FEEL? (Incriminating and blaming the other will only aggravate the situation, expressing your emotions and how you feel will open a healthy dialogue). Indeed this person may not even notice that she/he is acting in such a negative way and since you have always tolerated the behavior, the individual may not think it impacts you.

Remember that most people are simply not aware of the kind of energy they put out there because they are focusing on themselves and don’t get real feedback which truly gives the opportunity to challenge oneself and its belief system.

“How much would you appreciate the feedback if you were this person?” may as well be an appropriate question to ask oneself.

I wish this will help the person to clear this draining energy in order to focus and to enjoy the realm of positive energy which fill you up!